Santa Paws is Here!

Here comes Santa Paws

Here comes Santa Paws

Right down Santa Paws Lane

Hitting every hydrant

from Australia to Zimbabwe 

Cause Santa Paws comes Tonight

WOOF! Wake up!  Santa Paws is here!

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

HERE'S A DUMB DOG TRICK VIDEO FOR YOU

Party Animal Mister Wolf

The Wolf

"Wanna go for a ride on my motorcycle?"  Mister Wolf put the offer out to all the boppers in the diner.  "Anybody?  Anybody?!"

Yeah, lots of people put sunglasses on their dogs.  Yeah, and lots of of people dress their dogs up in little outfits too.  It's perfectly normal, right?  Right?! I saw a study that said like a lot of dog owners (more than half) are millionaires but still only 6% of all dog owners buy little costumes and play dress up with their dogs.

Hey, I get it.  I'm doing it wrong!  (Or so say 94% of all dog owners.  I'm also NOT a millionaire.) But I can see old Moon Doggy in the photo saying, "Hey, baby how's it going?  We're gonna roast weenies on a fire.  Wanna come?"

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

CHECK OUT THIS YOUTUBE VIDEO!!!

"It's the Doggy Double Jump"

Eating Turkeys on Thanksgiving

I Like Eating Turkeys!

Wanna see more turkeys?  Real turkeys?  Live and running around free?  I have to warn you, you will be surprised by what you see.  Harmless birds, you might think.  Ha!  Far from it.

CLICK HERE TO SEE A VIDEO ABOUT TURKEYS

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

Dog Dylan Folk Singer Homemade Meme

What should you do with old photos?  
Turn them into homemade memes!!!

INTRODUCING: Dog Dylan!

I lost this photo for a while.  I missed it.  It was on my desktop computer when I ditched to a cool new laptop. 

I remember the day this photo was taken.  We took a lot of photos that day.  I had collected funny hats for a while.  This particular hat was my hat "au courant" ... I still wear that hat.  Still working on it like a plate of eggs.  I still have the sunglasses too.  

The Times They're achoooing!  

Here -- try it for yourself at home! Peace and love! 




CLICK HERE FOR A YOUTUBE DOG PARTY!

Zoozoo Disc Dog

I taught my dog to jump... 

She's a quick learner.  CLICK HERE to see Youtube video, "Zoozoo Disc Dog," featuring Zoozoo, my little Rhodesian Ridgeback sweetie girl friend.  

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

Hey, kid, wanna see a dumb dog trick?

Today's Dumb Dog Trick...

The menu for today includes three dumb dogs.

1.  CLICK HERE TO WATCH THE VIDEO, 

"Lady Bug Swim Lesson (Dumb Dog Trick #283)."

Red Dog teaches a lady bug to swim, well sort of.

2.  CLICK HERE TO WATCH THE VIDEO, 

"Red Dog Ninja Freakout (Dumb Dog Trick #282)."

Red Dog is a ninja, and ninjas aren't afraid of anything!

3.  CLICK HERE TO WATCH THE VIDEO, 

"Musical Chairs for Dogs."

Red Dog, Blue Dog and their sister, Zoozoo, perform a bunch of tricks together!

JIMMYJUMPNJIVE 2012

Zoozoo, Zoozoo Disc Dog

Zoozoo Disc Dog

CLICK TO SEE THE YOUTUBE VIDEO

Gingrich dumbfounded by his own tongue

"There's this thing in my mouth," started former House Speaker Newt Gingrich.  Then he cracked a silly smile.  "I dunno what it is."

"It's your tongue, stupid," shot back Callista.

"A wongue? Whatzit wooing in wy wouth?!" mumbled Newt in a dumbfounded manner.

"Obama was elected president again," Callista told him, hoping wipe the goofy look off Newt's face.

"Wah, Kwap," replied Newt.

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

The folks at Dumb Dog Tricks International performed extensive political research in creating the following video response to the American Political system.  CLICK HERE TO SEE IT.

Photograph by Gage Skidmore.  This photograph was thereafter altered by Jimmyjumpnjive as allowed for in accordance with a Creative Commons License Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0.  Future use of this image is allowed under the same Creative Commons license with attribution due to Gage Skidmore as modified by Jimmyjumpnjive.  Peace and love.  Remember to laugh.

More of Mr. Skidmore’s work can be found at:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/gageskidmore/  
and
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/User:Gage

Happy Veterans Day

It's a Dogs Wearing Funny Hats Veterans Day!

boo-yah!

Red Dog wears a funny hat in celebration of Veterans' Day.

I never served in the military, but my father and my best friend did.  My dad was in the Army (Korean conflict).  My best friend was in the Navy (Viet Nam era).  These are two very good men.  Brave soldiers who fought for freedom and democracy.  Their efforts should be honored and never forgotten.  I am very proud of them both.

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

If you just can't get enough of Dogs Wearing Funny Hats ... CLICK HERE to see a silly video full of stuff like this.  AND by the way, Red Dog was not a bad dog, he was silly and misunderstood but he was not bad.

Who is Paula Broadwell and why did General Patraeus destroy his career for her love

WHO IS PAULA BROADWELL?

The entire world is asking that question right now.  Here's a few photos and links to stories about her ...

Two photos of Paula with General Patraeus.  One photo came from Ms. Broadwell's personal blog, which has since been taken down.  She and General Petraeus look familiar, although not necessarily cosy.  Why would the good General be attracted to this woman? 

Well she's pretty, athletic, brave and intensely intelligent.  Only a fool wouldn't be taken (if given the chance) by Paula Broadwell.  She can explain it all to her husband, a radiologist in the Carolinas.  She's a novelist, a professional teller of stories, so she can spin it however she likes.  Oh, and she and the aforementioned radiologist have two children ... can anybody say, "Geez, Mom, cut it out!  The kids at school are starting to tease me."  

But it's sort of like the girl can't help it, she's an American goddess who abandoned common sense and reason to have an affair with one of the most powerful men on the planet.  She researched her subject well, being his official biographer.  Her reward for this action will be fame and possibly fortune.  Oh, and her book will now sell better, right?  The discovery of the affair may impact her personal privacy in addition to her marriage and family.

CLICK HERE to see Paul Broadwell on the Daily Show with John Stewart

CLICK HERE for an awesome article from USA Today about Paula Broadwell.

The photos used in this blog post are believed to be in the public domain.
including a publicity photo of Ms. Broadwell.

Shush! Zoozoo is taking a nap

Shhhh ... be very quiet ...

Zoozoo is taking a nap.  Yes, it's very cute that she puts her head on a pillow like a person, but right now Zoozoo is very tired from playing and eating and playing some more.  She has to take a nap.  Nighty night.

If you want to see Zoozoo playing you will have to CLICK HERE.

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

The Jesus Doesn't Care Song

JESUS DOESN'T CARE HOW YOU COMB YOUR HAIR

Why would Jesus care about how you comb your hair? 

 I think that's part of the deal, right?  If you're a Christian, you have to believe at some level that God gave you hair AND ALSO gave you the freedom to do what you will with it. Such a principal would, of course, be passed from God to Jesus.  I'm right so far, huh?

CLICK HERE TO WATCH A VIDEO ABOUT THIS

So, like your uncle the tax attorney, God and Jesus are way to busy to worry about your hair or the lack thereof and would prefer REALLY if you would just figure it out for yourself.  God might mumble something about what you're doing with your hair.  Jesus might say something noncommittal like, "If it makes you happy that's nice."

They're just shining you on, though.  A brain fart for God would be like plate tectonics for all of us.  God knows so much about everything, you know.

So, it goes to say, that Jesus (God's son) probably didn't fall far from the tree.  He probably doesn't even care if you believe in him or if you believe in whatever.  God and Jesus would probably be more interested in whether you were personally able to make yourself overall a "good" or a "bad" person. (Unless the Mormons really are right.)  But  God wouldn't make a determination as important as all that just by looking at the dead cells hanging out of your skull, would he?

Therefore ... we are coming full circle to the beginning here ... Jesus Doesn't Care How You Comb Your Hair.

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

Election Night Coverage in Redneckland

How does one get to be the king of the Rednecks?  Ain't nothing to it, actually, it's a birthright.

This sign is down near the border between Washington state and Oregon.

It's a sign owned by an old farmer, who has fought for the right to make political speech on this sign.

Although it's not clear most of the time, I think old man Hamilton is a Republican.

DOES THIS MAKE YOU WANT TO VOTE FOR MITT?

Romney's Election Eve Pitch for Election

ELECTION NIGHT JITTERS?

Romney was doing so well, keeping his mouth shut, agreeing with Obama about all that weird, confusing foreign policy stuff ... Then he realized that he was failing the American public in his primary mandate as THE Mormon candidate.  Yes, so he decided to warn us all of the impending zombie attack.  Bull goose looney, no?

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

HERE'S AN ELECTION VIDEO FOR YOU
CLICK HERE

Photograph by Gage Skidmore.  This photograph was thereafter altered by Jimmyjumpnjive as allowed for in accordance with a Creative Commons License Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0.  Future use of this image is allowed under the same Creative Commons license with attribution due to Gage Skidmore as modified by Jimmyjumpnjive.  Peace and love.  Remember to laugh.

More of Mr. Skidmore’s work can be found at:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/gageskidmore/  
and
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/User:Gage

Happy Birthday Cupcakes

Did you see the birthday cupcakes I made for you?  Happy Birthday to you, I love you!

Still don't believe it?  Then go to the VIDEO

CLICK FOR PROOF THAT I BIRTHDAY LOVE YOU

No I don't smell anything (Fart Jokes)

"What's that?"  I asked the dog. "I don't smell anything."

"Are you kidding me!" the dog exclaimed, "that smell could knock a buzzard off a shit wagon."

"Under the doctrine of He Who Smelt it Dealt It," I explained, "You are a farter."

"Yeah, Yeah," replied the dog.  "He who denied it supplied it."

"You biffed it," I said with holier than thou attitude, "You wiffed it."

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

CLICK HERE TO SEE A

VIDEO ABOUT CALIFORNIANS

Totally Snot Fair!

Why you give the kittehs cheezburgers?  I want one two.

Jimmyjumpnjive 2012

CLICK HERE TO SEE

A WALRUS BURP THE ALPHABET!